As children grow they begin to receive a lot of new information that opens
their lives to the world outside.
Then, it is extremely important to create the climate of trust so that our
children can ask questions and speak freely with us. The development that
occurs between seven and twelve years of age is enormous and is a stage in
which parents must lay the foundation for effective communication in the
In this phase, children must be equipped with the ability to reason with
their friend and peers, and to understand the necessity of respecting their
parents’ decisions on many issues such as: time spent using new technology,
things they buy, decisions to take part in or decline certain programs,
which TV shows to watch etc. The answers to these questions are not
self-evident, and though we may be able to respond quickly, it is advisable
to search for the opportune moment to take up the most serene argument with
our children. For some questions that may be prompted— if it is not raised
spontaneously by the child—it is our task to facilitate discussion on the
topic and provoke the conversation to its completion taking advantage of
We have to take the chance on the spot, otherwise it will be handled by our
child outside the home very soon. The origin of life being explained by
ourselves or got from peers make a big difference to our kids. .
These are some ways we can open communication within our families.
1. Create occasions for dialogue within the family, for
example, have dinner together without television and cell phones.
2. Take weekend excursions with the whole family. It
enables conversation that lack of time and contact to not allow during the
Conduct family chats in a way that siblings do not overlap one another
or prevent the most timid children from speaking their minds.
4. Occasionally dedicate exclusive time with each child.
In a relaxed environment it is easier for kids to share their anxieties
5. Give importance to all of their concerns, from disputes
with their friends to the first pimple that appears and makes them feel
horrible. Never laugh at children in such a way we would compromise all
6. An ideal moment for chatting is right before bed, when
the child is already under the covers and feels relaxed. We can sit
together with him or her and recount the things of the day and its
Who doesn’t remember Sunday mornings in our parents’ room?
Children come in after having just woken up, climb into the warm covers and
probably even push into you for something familiar. Don’t let this moment
8. Take advantage of opportune moments. Another good
occasion could be when one spouse is out of town for work and the children
race to the bed to sleep with mom or dad. That night perhaps is the time to
put down the book and dedicate ourselves to talking with our kids.
9. Take advantage of birthdays or feast days to take them
out from school for a special lunch. It will make them feel important in
front of their classmates and they will be more receptive to your advice.
Reproduced, with kind permission, from