If only I could speak… A letter from a newborn to his mom

If only I could speak… A letter from a newborn to his mom

Dear mom,

If only I could speak, I would tell you so many things.

First of all, I’d tell you thank you.

Thank you because you welcomed me.

Living in your warm womb these past nine months – enveloping and reassuring me – has been wonderful.

Yes, thank you for making me grow inside of you: it was so enjoyable that when I came into the world, I felt disoriented.

I was scared to not hear your heart beating anymore. How lost was I!

I found comfort only when you tightly held me in your arms.

The physicians and nurses took care of me at the time of my birth: they were smiling at me and talking to me in order to calm my crying, but I was looking all around me searching only for you.

I knew that, even without having ever seen you before, I would have been able to recognize your scent out of all the scents of the world.

And you know, it went exactly like that!

As soon as the doctors put me in your arms, I felt at home.

That moment was magical because, finally, I got to see your face, which I had only been able to imagine for so many months.

The first time I saw you, you transmitted to me such serenity, even though you were marked by the pain of so many hours of labor

I will never forget how you looked at me.

Or better yet, unfortunately I will not have any memory of it, but the tenderness of those instants will always remain etched in me, like a hidden treasure, which is not seen, but still enriched me just as much.

I will never remember everything you do for me now, yet every gesture of love that you show me will help me to grow.

It's a bit like what happens with the water that, disappearing in the earth, feeds a plant from its roots and makes it flourish.

As soon as I found you again, after I was born, I realized that I could always count on you.

The life that awaited me was ahead of me now, but you would never leave me during my journey in the world.

It's been a few weeks since I was born and you continue to reassure me that you truly want to take care of me.

Thanks for everything you're doing.

Thank you for your caresses, which give me courage and confidence, thank you for your milk that feeds me, thank you for giving up your spaces, your friends, your favorite TV series… your hours.

Thank you for always running to me when I need something and thank you because, although you are often exhausted, you are never too tired to give me a smile.

All right, sometimes maybe you are truly exhausted because I make life really difficult for you.

But I don’t do it on purpose, believe me.

If I cry for hours every day and for any given reason, it’s only because I don’t know any other way to express myself.

If I prefer to sleep next to you instead of in the cradle, it's because I feel protected when I’m beside you.

Who could hurt me with you at my side?

I’m sorry if I just can’t go without your hands. They remind me that I will always have a safe haven in which to take refuge.

Sorry if I wake up at night because I'm hungry, because I'm sick, or simply because I'm not sleepy anymore and I want to spend every moment with you. Sorry that I cannot change and dress myself.

I'm sorry because I know I'm a commitment that costs you a lot.

I know that sometimes you think you can’t do it anymore. And maybe you would like to sleep, eat, or just take a walk without fearing that I’ll burst into tears at any moment.

I know your life has been hard since I've been around.

Yet every day, you try not to let me become a burden.

You do everything while masking your tiredness.

You do everything without showing me how much it costs you.

You always put me before yourself.

And perhaps now you don’t even know it: but every sacrifice of yours will be repaid.

Because love is never wasted, and only those who sow in pain will reap in joy.

I was with you in your belly that day when you read a passage from a book you love: "Those who love their life will lose it, those who lose it will earn it.”

With Dad beside you, you’d commented: "Is not this becoming a parent?"

Yes, mom, it’s exactly this...

You are losing your life for me, but nothing that you are sowing now will be lost.

I can’t wait to show you the fruit of your labors of loving me unconditionally with the rest of my life.

With love,

Your little baby girl